It’s already the 4th of January. You may already have forgotten what you wanted to change this year. The cold and rainy weather (at least here in the Netherlands) isn’t really helpful. Or you may have read somewhere that trying to change habits at the start of a new year is totally ineffective.
Well, I don’t agree with that! If only you don’t expect your habits or your life to change as if effected by a magical stick directly on New Year’s day, you can achieve very good results. Let’s say you want to quit smoking. Of course you won’t have quitted directly the first day! No, if you have such expectations, you’d better read my newsletter until the end. If you want it to work, you start giving yourself the right mood or ‘energy’ if you want, already in December: at the start of the new year I will quit smoking. And you get exited about it; you really believe it.
Then as the year starts, you take another deep breath – and that can take a few days! – to first diminish smoking. If you like smoke 10 packages per week, you first go to 7. That will take some weeks! Then you keep on smoking 7 packages per week until you feel ready to go to the next step: 4 packages per week. Or 5 maybe, what you want. You give yourself all the time and all the support you need and if you smoke too much sometimes, you forgive yourself and start the countdown again. If it still doesn’t work, there is an inhibition and you need to call me to get the thing away.
This is how you can make things work! By giving yourself credit and self-confidence. If you get mad at yourself because you can’t get it done, you fill yourself up with stress and anxiety. That makes any plan you try to carry out, unnecessarily more difficult. You have been doing the things you don’t want anymore for years, maybe even decades. There is nothing stronger in the world than a habit! In Greece we say that even married people most of all stay together, because they’re used to each other. It’s more a habit than love after so many years and there is some truth in that. Whatever you want to change in your life, it is a habit you have to break and that will take time!
So give it time! Tell yourself you can do it and you will do it. Do I already sound like Dr. Phill? I saw him on tv the other day after years and I still believe he is one of the best coaches in the world. Why? Because he is soooo positive and soooo logic and he’s got humor too. I know sometimes you can even get through energetic blocks in this way, but only if they are small. If there are really people silently and secretly blocking your success, then you will have to pass by me and get it fixed (have me eliminate ’em ol’ hags).
Whatever you plan to change this year: go on and don’t give up! Don’t look back at your so-called failures, because they’re just the running start. If you want to leap, you also take a running start, don’t you? And if it really doesn’t work, then just know there is an inhibition that is too strong to be broken without me looking at it. Don’t give yourself a hard time and be the boss in your life!
I have a great old song for you that you can always listen to at hard moments. It’s Peter Tosh and Mick Jagger and the rest you will hear for yourself. Do listen to it! It will give you power to go on getting all the leadership of your own life back:
© Sophia Vassiliou